Anger Management
by Raditzu-chan
Summary: Characters from DBZ, Legend of Zelda, and Chobits mix it up when they get put into a class to help them with their "anger problems". Hell ensues.


This is a story about a few characters from DBZ, Link from Legend of Zelda, and Kotoko from Chobits. They have been classified as 'In Need Of Psychological Help', and are now in the subject care of our hired professional. Lets watch.  
  
Disclaimer: I in no way claim the rights to DBZ, Legend of Zelda, Chobits, Anger Management, or any other related subjects. Though, I do own this story! Yay! ^_^  
  
**scene** POV = A camera positioned midway up the back wall, overlooking a small room. Krillin stands at the front of the room, surrounded by a semicircle of chairs filled with those who have been sent to him for help, from left to right; Link, Kotoko, Raditz, and Vegeta. And so, the session begins...  
  
"OK, now, say it with me... goosfrabah" Krillin said to the people surrounding him, all shifting restlessly in the wooden chairs that had been laid out for them. It had only been a few minutes, and already he could tell that his problem students weren't going to be very cooperative.  
  
"Bakayarou" muttered Vegeta under his breath, "calling me out here when I could be training!" He flexed his fingers impulsively, imagining them around Krillin's scrawny little neck. How sweet it would be, if only there were no bald, happy people in the world!  
  
Even though he knew it was hopeless, Krillin tried again. "Goosfra..."  
  
"Urasai, kuttosare!!" Raditz burst out, standing up suddenly and knocking over his chair. He flushed and glanced around, noting to himself that there weren't many people around, so he knew he could be as much of an idiot as he liked.  
  
"Now Raditz, there's nothing to get riled up about." Krillin stated as he looked up into the hairy mass of manliness. "OK, say it with me...goosfrabah...goosfrabah..."  
  
"Kuso, watashi na otetsudai" muttered Raditz as he picked up his chair and resumed his seat beside Vegeta, who sniggered at him quietly.  
  
"Come on, say it with me! This can help you people turn your sadistic lives around! Just ask that guy over there..." Krillin said, waving a hand in the general direction of some weird, green-clothed elf with a sword.  
  
"Yeah, the little bald dude's right." Grinning, Link stood up and went to stand beside Krillin, who had turned a pretty shade of magenta at the bald comment. Link continued, "I've stopped my killing spree now, and I'm quite happy in the castle at Hyrule with my many, many girlfriends and such."  
  
"That's not what you told me last night..." mumbled Raditz. Vegeta, upon overhearing this 'self reflection', was suddenly reminded of Goku, alone and frightened like a school girl at home, waiting for him (under the sheets), which made him all the more mad, and he started to growl in a possessive manner.  
  
"Damare, baka chikusho. We have other things to worry about." Stunned, for they thought that the insult was directed at both of them, Vegeta and Raditz looked over at the small figure isolated in the middle of a stool on the other side of Raditz.  
  
"Nande?" Inquired Raditz, jabbing a finger into the side of Kotoko's head repeatedly like he'd never seen a talking doll before.  
  
"Damare, damare! Zakkenayo!!" she yelled, fending off the prodding finger with a vicious growl.  
  
"Yamete!" said Krillin, who stood 'menacingly' up at the front of the room. "Urasai and listen, everybody. Things are getting a little out of hand here..."  
  
"No they're damn well not!" Raditz growled, and moved towards the cowering, short bald man. "Urasai! Yamete! Damare! Is that all that we're going to hear from your filthy mouth??" demanded Raditz, his voice snapping, "I'm sick of this bullshit... shine!!" Raising his hand, he prepared to release a large energy blast in Krillin's general direction. He froze suddenly, and twisted his head to look at Vegeta, who had hold of his tail. "Hanase, damn it, hanase!" Raditz yelled furiously, but it was obviously no good. Vegeta just ignored him and squeezed the saiyan's tail, watching him collapse.  
  
"Sumimasen, Raditz. But now is not the time for selfish acts. We must rid ourselves of this scourge... this bakayarou." Smirking, he let go of Raditz's tail. The big man got up, and nodded knowingly at Vegeta.  
  
Without warning, Goku walked in the door, went over to Vegeta, knocked him to the floor, and promptly started to make out. Everybody stopped what they had been doing and turned to stare at them. Raditz, who wasn't the slightest bit interested, grabbed Kotoko (she had been on his shoulder pressing buttons on his scouter) and threw her, a screaming bullet, at the pile of yaoi on the floor.  
  
[slow motion]  
  
"BAKAYAROU!! BAKAMONO!! BAKA MITAI!!... RADITZ!!!" she squeaked frantically, hurtling through the air at unbelievable speed. Goku looked up and got a face full of Kotoko, knocking him off a flustered Vegeta.  
  
[/slow motion]  
  
Brushing himself off, Vegeta stood up and went over to Raditz, as if nothing had ever happened. "Anyway... ready now?" questioned Raditz, and Vegeta nodded. They came together closely, side by side, and put their hands together.  
  
Someone yelled "Mine!" from behind Raditz, and kicked him in the head, causing him to fall flat on his face. Goku moved forward and took up his position beside Vegeta. Vegeta shrugged, not caring who helped him blow that annoying little man into oblivion.  
  
"Kame...... hame......haaaa!!" they screamed, shooting a huge ki blast right towards Krillin's surprised face. As a side note: Goku was licking Vegeta's cheek, who very much enjoyed it. And while Vegeta was enjoying that little lick, Raditz tried to get up off the floor, but Link jumped on top of him, yelling "Come back to the castle and join my harem!" to which Raditz graciously declined by kneeing Link in a place where it hurt.  
  
After all the smoke had cleared, it was obvious that Krillin was gone. Everybody rejoiced, and there was a make-out party at Goku's house soon afterwards. It was the perfect ending for everybody. 


End file.
